Rated R

Inspired by Poe's Not a Virgin. Lyrics can be found at the bottom of the page.


“He’s going to be there isn’t he?”

“Yes.” Josh scowled as he removed a stack of clothes from his suitcase. Donna took them from him and placed them in the dresser. Her best friend from college was getting married and Josh had promised she could go home for the wedding.

“I don’t want you to see him.”

“I probably won’t have a whole lot of choice in the matter. He’ll be at the rehearsal dinner.”

“Well you don’t have to talk to him.” Josh fumed.

“It’s not like I plan to go out of my way to see him, Josh.” Donna sighed as she took another stack of his clothes over to the closet. Josh sat down on the bed and scrubbed his hands through his hair in frustration.

“I know. I know, it’s just…..”

“I know.” Donna walked over to the bed and stood between his legs. He wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his head against her stomach. She threaded her fingers through his hair and placed a kiss on the top of his head.

“I wish you’d let me….”

“We’ve talked about this.” Josh sighed in resignation as Donna pulled from his grasp. He hated the fact that in a few short hours, Donna would more than likely come face to face with Michael William Stephenson, III aka Dr. Freeride. He was doing everything he could to keep his emotions under control. He and Donna had only been together a few months. He finally admitted his feelings for her after inadvertently kissing her goodbye in front of his girlfriend at the time, Amy Gardner.  Things had been going better than he ever could have imagined. The fact that they were together had pretty much been a non-story in the press. A few republicans tried to start some gossip, but for the most part most of DC wasn’t too concerned with their relationship. 

“What time do we have to be there?”


“Why do we have to go to the rehearsal dinner anyway? You’re not in the wedding.”

“Thank God for that.” Donna mumbled. “We’re out of town guests. It’s polite to invite us to the rehearsal dinner. Besides, I want to see Mary and David.”

“Which one’s the doctor?”

“Both of them.”

“Oh yeah.” Josh stood and stretched his back. He and Donna had worked most of the morning before taking an afternoon flight into Wisconsin.

“Why don’t you go ahead and take a shower?” Donna offered. Josh smirked at her as he reached out for her hand.

“You just want to call your mom and gossip.”


“Was she mad when you told her we weren’t staying with them?”

“Not really. I told her it would be a lot easier on Daddy if we got a hotel room.” Donna slid her arms around his waist.

“You could forgo the gossip and come take a shower with me.” He rubbed his hand down her back before pulling her closer.

“No time. I don’t want to be late to the dinner. Besides, I think Mary is a little nervous about having the Deputy Chief of Staff at her wedding.”

“I’m a celebrity Donna.”

“You’re an idiot.”

“But you love me.”

“Very much.” She lifted her face to his and sighed as he kissed her lower lip before sweeping the tip of his tongue into her mouth.

“You sure I can’t change your mind about that shower?”

“I’m sure. But hurry up. I’ve got to look good and that might take a while.”

“Donna, you’re gorgeous. You don’t need to work at it.” Donna smiled at his compliment.

“Yeah, well. I haven’t seen some of these people since high school and college.”

“What’s the matter? Donnatella Moss wasn’t the raving beauty of today back then?”

“I was a foot taller than half my class. I had braces and a bad perm. Raving beauty is not a term used often to describe me.”

“If they only knew then what I know now.”

“I still would have ended up watching Molly Ringwald movies at Christie Millborn’s house every Friday night.” Josh laughed as Donna pushed him toward the shower.




“I’m going to have a horrible time.”

“What else is new Joshua?” Donna called from behind the bathroom door.

“Are you at least going to let me drink?”

“One beer.”

“Donna.” He whined.

“I mean it. If you embarrass me in front of these people I’ll make you suffer for the rest of your life.”

“Okay, okay. I’ll be good.”

“And you have to stay until I’m ready to leave.” Josh sighed in mock frustration.

“Is this going to be one of those nights where everyone keeps asking you when you’re ‘next’.”

“I hope not. It’s bad enough my mother thinks she’ll never live to see her baby girl walk down the aisle.”

“Maybe she should call my mom and start a support group.”  Josh laughed. His laughter soon faded to amazement when Donna opened the bathroom door.

“Say something.” Donna stood before Josh and smoothed out her dress.

“I’ll do anything you want for the rest of my life if you let me throw you on that bed and make love to you all night.”

“So I look okay?”

“Okay? My God Donna, I don’t even want to let you out of this room.” Josh stepped toward her. He slid his hands across the smooth material.

“You don’t think red’s too brazen for a wedding rehearsal?” Josh kissed the side of her neck.

“Josh?” He brushed his thumb along the contour of her breast. “Josh.” She sighed.


“We can’t. We’re……going to be late.”

“So?” Donna extracted herself from his grasp as she took a deep breath in an effort to calm down.

“Josh, I’m serious. We have to go.” She reached out and straightened his tie while he exhaled.

“Jesus, Donna. You’re killing me here.”

“Let’s go Joshua.” She tugged on his suit coat before grabbing her purse. She took out a lipstick and handed it to Josh. He slipped it into his pocket without question. Long before they started dating, Josh knew that Donna hated carrying a purse when she went out. It was common practice since the campaign for Josh to haul around her license and whatever else she felt she’d need. Donna smoothed down the front of her dress when she noticed Josh’s mood shift.

“Stop thinking about it.”

“I don’t want him near you, Donna.”

“I can handle it.”

“He used you and broke your heart.”

“Thanks for bringing that up.”

“If he so much as…..”

“I’m not a virgin anymore, Josh! I can handle it!” Donna regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. She had never admitted that to him before. She looked up from her shoes to see his jaw clenched tight and his hands in tight fists at his side.

“I’m…I’m going to go pull the car around. I’ll meet you downstairs.” Donna could only nod her head as Josh left the hotel room and headed for the elevator.


** Dammit! Dammit! That son of a bitch! She was a virgin. That bastard was her first.  No wonder he had such control over her. Dammit! ** Josh slammed his fist against the wall of the elevator. The wheels immediately started turning. His mind was working overtime trying to formulate a swift and violent plan to make Dr. Freeride regret ever being born, much less breaking the heart of one Donnatella Moss. Josh finally managed to control his anger filled breathing by the time he pulled the car around to the front of the hotel. He exited the car and opened Donna’s door for her. He waited until she fastened her seatbelt before closing her door. He slid into the driver’s seat and was about to drive off. He sighed before reaching over and taking her hand.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered while staring into the darkness. She squeezed his hand and offered him a smile.

“It’s okay. It’s just…..I don’t care if I see him.”

“What if……” Donna was surprised at the insecurity she saw in Josh’s eyes when he turned to look at her.

“I’m in love with you, Josh. He doesn’t control me anymore. I’m not going to take one look at him and swoon. It’s just not going to happen.”

“Let me at least have him audited.” Donna laughed before leaning across the seat to kiss him.

“Let’s go. I’m starving.”



Donna held tightly to Josh’s hand as they entered the private dinning room of the restaurant. As soon as they crossed the threshold a short red-haired woman practically knocked Donna over.

“Donna!” Donna wrapped her arms around the woman and squealed in delight.

“Sally! You look great!” Sally held onto Donna’s arms and looked at her.

“You look gorgeous!” Donna reached out for Josh’s hand again and pulled him to her side.

“Sally Syttleman….”


“Sally Syttleman Miller.” Donna smiled. “This is Josh Lyman.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you, Josh.  It’s a pleasure.”

“So you and Donna went to high school together?”

“And college. For a while anyway.” Josh noticed Donna slightly tuck her head. He squeezed her hand and offered her a warm smile.

“Should we find our table?” He offered.

“You’re over here with me and Kevin.” Sally motioned to the opposite side of the room.

“Have you seen Mary and David, yet?”

“They’re over by the bar. Let’s go talk to them.”

The three made their way over to the bar at the back of the large dining room toward the future bride and groom. Donna and Sally fawned over Mary while Josh made polite small talk with David. The rehearsal dinner was about to start so Donna and Sally headed toward the table.


“Would you like a drink, Donna?”

“Please.” Josh nodded and headed for the bar leaving Sally and Donna to talk.

“He’s gorgeous.”

“I know.”

“That picture doesn’t do him justice.”

“What picture?”

“The one on the website?”

“Whatever you do, don’t bring that up. Please don’t bring that up. It’s bad enough Josh fixated on the stupid thing. He’ll kill me if he found out I emailed the link to everyone I know.” The two friends laughed comfortably with each other until Donna caught a glance of someone out of the corner of her eye.

“What’s wrong?” Sally asked noting the dark expression that had flashed across Donna’s face.

“Nothing. I’m fine.” She recovered with a strained smile. Sally followed the direction of her gaze and shook her head.

“I completely forgot about him being here.”

“What? Michael? It’s not a big deal.”

“He’s still an asshole.” Donna laughed at the bluntness of her friend.


“What? You know it’s true. After what he did to you, I’m surprised you haven’t had him taken out by one of those secret service agents.”

“It doesn’t really work that way. Besides, they have their hands full with protecting the President and all.”

“Oh God, trouble is coming this way.” Sally whispered moments before Donna felt a hand slip across her shoulder and to the back of her neck.

“Don?” Donna closed her eyes and swallowed the bitter taste in the back of her throat. She pulled away slightly to free herself from his touch.


“Mary said you were coming.” Michael cast a glace at Sally. She took the hint and quickly excused herself from the table. This, she felt, was better viewed at a distance.




Donna turned in her chair and was facing him. He leaned closer to her and draped his arm along the back of her chair.

“What do you want, Michael?”

“Can’t an old friend stop by and say ‘hi’.”

“Hi.” Donna turned away from him, hoping he’d get the hint. A waitress walked by and Michael motioned for her.

“I’ll have a Seagram’s Seven and she’ll have a white wine spritzer.” Donna closed her eyes at the audacity this man possessed. She looked around for Josh. He was standing by the bar. He appeared to be cornered by several older men. **Great, they must recognize him. **

“So how have you been Donna? I heard you were working in Washington as a receptionist or something.” Donna refused to be baited. She gave him a bored expression and replied with a small emotionless smile.

“Something like that.”

Josh looked up to see a man sitting a little too close to Donna for his tastes. Once he saw the look on Donna’s face, he knew exactly who it was. He excused himself from the bar and walked toward the table. He didn’t make his presence known at first. He couldn’t help but be struck by the condescending tone this man was using with Donna.

“Mary tells me you answer phones in the White House. That must be exciting for a girl like you.”

“A girl like me?” Donna decided to let him have enough rope to hang himself. Michael leaned a little closer and rubbed his finger along her arm.

“Yeah, the possibility of getting a glimpse at the President of the United States. It must be exciting for a you.”

“Yeah, it is.”

“You look great.” Donna rolled her eyes. It was hard for her to believe that at one time a kind word and an empty smile was all it took to have her melting at this man’s feet.

“And you Michael look exactly the same.” She said dryly. Michael gave her a mock pout and pulled her closer to him. Josh took a step forward.

“Oh now, come on Don, don’t be that way. You can’t still be mad at me. I thought you and I could spend a little……time…..together.”  Donna couldn’t suppress the laugh that escaped her throat. She laughed in his face and it felt wonderful.

“You’re kidding!?”

“You can’t honestly say you haven’t missed us.”

“Us? There was never an ‘us’! There was you. I was an afterthought. You must think I’m an idiot. How pathetic do you think I am? You used me once. You’ll never do it again.”

“I never used you Don.”

“And don’t call me Don.”

“I was just trying to be nice. I guess you’re not big enough to be friends.” Donna squared her shoulders and looked him in the eyes.

“No I guess I’m not. I don’t feel the need to be friends with a man that only wanted me for my long legs and my back account.” He slid his arm over her bare shoulders again and offered her a placating smile.

“Don…..” Donna shrugged off his arm again and glared at him. Josh wanted to interrupt but he knew by the set of her body she was going in for the kill.

“Don’t even try it. It won’t work. Oh sure, your smooth touches and soft words used to have me running into your arms, but that was a young stupid girl who had nothing to compare you to. But you know what Michael? I’m not a virgin anymore. I know what it’s like to be loved by a real man. Loved and ‘satisfied’ more than you could even fathom. So do us both a favor and don’t waste my time.” Donna leaned forward and raised her voice just a fraction.

“By the way, I’m not a receptionist. I’m Assistant to the Deputy Chief of Staff of the United States.  I know the President and he knows me. I’ve stood in the Oval Office and advised the President and I frequently fly on Air Force One. Furthermore, I’m currently dating the man I intend to spend the rest of my life with. So if you don’t mind, you’re in his seat.”

Michael stared at her a moment before slipping an arrogant smile onto his face.

“You know the President?”


“Sure, Don.” Donna seethed at the smug expression on his face. Josh strolled up and placed his hand on her back.

“Sorry I took so long. Seems that the father of the bride is a democrat and wanted to know where to donate to the campaign. Leo called. We’re meeting with the President tomorrow evening as soon as our flight gets in. He wants you to get him a complete run down on the demographics for our next stop. We’ve got to check in with him as soon as we leave here. I told him you can email him some preliminaries once we got back to the hotel.” He paused a moment to look over at Michael.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Josh Lyman. Are you a friend of Donna’s?”

“We were more than friends.”  Josh smirked and leaned a little closer to Donna.

“I see. Then you’re an idiot.”

“Joshua.” Donna warned.

“What? Any man without the sense to hang on to a woman like you is an idiot to say the very least, Donnatella. I’m sure I’m just stating the obvious.”

“True.” Donna smiled at him. Michael stood and tugged at his suit coat.

“Seems you’ve become quite the bitch, Don.”

“Years of experience, Michael. By the way, I’d pay close attention to your tax returns from now on.”

“Why’s that?” He asked with a condescending grin. Josh stood up and faced him with a look he reserved for those he truly wanted to destroy.

“Because you just insulted the future wife of the third most powerful man of the United States.” Josh paused for effect and allowed his patented smirk to slip into place. “And the IRS works for me.”

Michael’s face paled a fraction while Donna laughed. Josh turned his back on him and kissed Donna on the cheek before settling beside her again. Michael stormed past Sally and Mary as they rushed over to Donna.

“That was a joy to watch!” Sally gushed. Donna looked up startled.

“Oh Mary, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to cause a scene at your rehearsal dinner. Please forgive me.”

“Forgive you? Honey, that was the most fun I’ve had all week! Did you see the look on his face when you told him you know the President? Oh I hope Kevin got it on tape.” Mary looked around to see Kevin giving her the thumbs up from behind a small handheld video camera.

“I told you he was an asshole Donna.” Sally laughed.

“Well, I guess Dr. Freeride finally got what was coming to him.” Josh grinned.

“Dr. Freeride?! Oh that’s perfect!” Mary howled. “I can’t wait to page him over the system at the office!” Donna tucked her head and tried to control her laughter. Josh slipped his hand along her neck and pulled her to his shoulder. Sally and Mary moved to where Kevin was standing so they could see what he had caught on tape.

“You didn’t have to say that, you know.” Donna spoke softly to him as she looked into his eyes.

“Say what?”

“That part about your future wife. It was nice but you didn’t…..”

“I meant it.” He slipped his fingers through hers and brought her hand to his lips. “Besides, I seem to recall you making the statement that you were dating the man you planned on spending the rest of your life with.”

“You heard that?”

“I did.”


She smiled as she lightly kissed his lips.

“I did lie about one thing, though.”  Josh grinned while Donna leaned back to look at him with a smile on his face.


“I’m not having a horrible time.” Donna laughed as Josh pressed a soft kiss against her cheek.

“Me either.”



I'm not a virgin anymore
I just thought you should know
Darlin' I've been around
I been up and down your block
In fact I have been all over town
Down by the lake
And underneath the table in my living room
Outside by the blue blue moon

You can call me what you will
Call me a slut call me a jaded pill
But darlin I've got your number now

I'm not a virgin anymore
I've been taken
I've been hung up
I get down and start it over again
I've been open
And I've been closed like a book
And burned down like a written sin
I just thought you should know my darling
Before we begin
I'm not a virgin anymore

Just thought you should know
Before you let another lie
Get through those crooked little teeth
I don't think you wanna start that shit with me

Much better yet
Tell me something dangerous and true
Oh yeah that looks much sexier on you

Careful what it is you say
'Cause I can see right through you
On a cloudy day and darlin' I think you wanna play
I'm not a virgin anymore
I've been taken
I've been hung up
I get down and start it over again
I've been open
And I've been closed like a book
And burned down like a written sin
So if you wanna play dirty darling I'm gonna win
I'm not a virgin anymore

Been there done that
(Say what?)
Get the hang of it
Get screwed
I screw you I had a whole lot of fun with it
I've had enough now so you better take a bow
It's gonna be a new experience if you wanna play with me

Daisy chains and Mary Jane’s
fairy tales cannot fool me now

I've been taken
I've been hung up
I get down and start it over again
I've been open
And I've been closed like a book
And burned down like a written sin
Hell I've been divided
Out of my mind and reinvented again
I've been ignited and then uninvited
So honey
You break it up
I'm gonna put it back together again
I just thought you should know my darling
Before we begin

I'm not a virgin anymore

feedback is appreciated. :)